What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
