tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Randomize