it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
I woke up under a house in Key West
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