and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
