he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
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