No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
God, I missed his penis.
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