can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
