Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I'm so fucking centered right now
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Randomize
