Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Randomize
