Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
