Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
