so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
