Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
