thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
