He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
