He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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