69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
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