That's intense
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
