So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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