Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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