Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
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