I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
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