I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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