Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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