Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
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he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
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he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Randomize