Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
