she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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