I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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