This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize