I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
