i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize