Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize