Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry helovesit hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(408): View more from California

420 ftw

Fav 16 1668 811
share tweet
(240): View more from Maryland

woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.

Fav 24 4420 1644
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(401): View more from Rhode Island

She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair

Fav 9 1369 2494
share tweet
(760): View more from California

Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.

(1-760): View more from California

Party city is having a sale on maracas

Fav 5 2600 876
share tweet
(813): View more from Florida

Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult

Fav 6 2186 825
share tweet
(978): View more from Massachusetts

By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?

Fav 4 1801 795
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(978): View more from Massachusetts

my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried

Fav 3 1364 578
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(925): View more from California

You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.

Fav 0 83 12
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(317): View more from Indiana

Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis

(317): View more from Indiana

preferably one with a six figure job and a boat

Fav 0 41 43
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT