What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Randomize
