you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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