So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
