Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize