i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
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