That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
