One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
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