he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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