I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
All the doctor said was why
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Randomize
