I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I need to sanitize my soul.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
