I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
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It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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