"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
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