so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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