Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Randomize
