just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
