I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
