normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
