my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize